When He opens His hands

Oftentimes...

I lift my hands up,

to be filled,

or to give.

I know this now,

or at least I should have learned this by now...

and so I do it,

maybe after a great struggle,

or a "sometimes it's just easy to bend" struggle of the wills,

either way...

I want to do this...

I want to be open to His will,

but sometimes,

sometimes,

what He brings, or what He shows,

or what He gives,

it overwhelms.

My hands lay at my sides,

because that is all that I can do.

How can this be,

when He opens His hands.

I deserve nothing,

but He gives from the depths of His riches,

His goodness,

His mercy

and love...

How He acts on our behalf,

I am in awe,

my heart can only beat it's thanks sometimes,

because words do, so often, fail.

Sometimes,

sometimes,

I...

but

always,

always,

He...

These all look to You,
to give them their food in due season.
When You give it to them, they gather it up;
when You open your hand, they are filled with good things.

Psalm 104:27-28

With Love

It was supposed to be a sunny day,

warm and smelling of spring;

but instead it was a chilly day,

cold, rainy and dim.

So instead of the favorite picnic table

underneath the pines, with little yellow

lanterns hanging from the bows,

we had this...

... and lanterns instead, all in a row

... and mismatched china plates

... and roses so sweet, you could have cried

... and vintage vases, whispering the colors of the sea

and of warmer days ahead.

Photo credit: Bethany

Yes, this day was special...

it was Mother's Day.

We love you, Momma-Lou!

"And He gave them their request,

But sent leanness into their

soul."

Psalm 106:15

I have often read this verse, but not always

have I understood it in a way that I do now.

I remember reading about the Israelites

on their journey through the wilderness...

how long it took them, how they thirsted and

hungered and complained and tested God through it all.

I remember how the Lord was patient with them,

how He waited for them, and waited for them, and waited for them...

and how they could not wait for Him.

I remember how He gave them their request...

what a breath of fresh air, a relief, a dream

come true!

Finally. They got their way...

Often times, that is how I feel...

but here, in this verse, it tells me a different

story.

It tells a story of leanness, of want and

perhaps of loss. Not of gain...

except

in the sense of temporary fulfillment.

In times of waiting, we are tested.

"You have tested my heart;

You have visited me in the

night;"

Psalm 17:3a

The Lord is always watching and waiting...

"Behold, the eye of the Lord

is on those who fear Him,

On those who hope in His

mercy."

Psalm 33:18

Sometimes, we must wait as well.

I do not want leanness of soul.

I do not want my requests answered,

only to find that while I have all

of my desires fulfilled, I find that my heart

and soul are lean.

I want to receive all that the Lord has

set for me,

whether it be years of waiting

or years of fast answers.

I do not want to miss all that He may do

in my life, because I am too impatient,

selfish and grumbling...

but instead, I want to trust Him completely.

To know that He does all things well,

He is Good.

"For the word of the Lord is

right,

And all His work is done in

truth."

Psalm 33:4

I am learning...

to love today.

Sometimes, in hoping for tomorrow...

I lose sight of the blessings of today.

Life is a precious gift,

and we are never promised another...

it is given to us,

one day at a time.

Each day is a stitch in the fabric of our lives...

without the ones in-between,

we would have holes...

missing pieces.

Every moment counts for eternity,

the days when everything just seems so ordinary,

when no one sees,

when all is just... normal.

That's when it counts...

that is life,

that's what we have been given.

It is a gift.

Thankfulness

If I never get to see the sun set upon a golden hill,

or across a sparkling lake,

if never I see the colors of a rainbow,

or the tender brush strokes on each flower petal,

if I never see a smile on a face,

the crinkle of laughter around eyes,

the way the wind bends the grasses,

or whispers through the leaves,

if I never see the hands that grasp my own,

or the blessings that I hold....

if I never see a single thing...

I will be thankful for the warmth of the sun as it sets across the way,

the awe in other's voices as they watch the grand display,

I will breathe deeply the sweet smell of the rose,

and feel it's tender grace,

I will listen to the laughter of those around me,

and remember the joy,

I will stand and let the wind blow about me,

breathe it in,

smell it,

and listen to its song,

I will hold tightly to the hands that hold to me,

but ready to release,

I will cherish the warmth and love felt there...

I will be thankful...

for what He has chosen to give,

for it is good.

"Let us hope that we are all preceded in this world by a love story."

For so long, as long as I can remember,

I have wondered who my ancestors were.

What did they do, what did they look like?

Did they have hopes and dreams...

did they have struggles just like me...

were they brave,

were they kind?

Did they think about their future

children and their future generations?

Did they know the Lord,

did they love Him?

Were they called by His name?

~~~~~

Last year, my grandmother, on my mother's side, told me about her

great, great Uncle Newton Nutting... how

he was a judge and a U.S. Representative from

NY state. I decided to look him up for further

study and found with great delight, a book written

by him entitled, 'The History of One Day Out of Seventeen Thousand.'

This particular book is a story of one day, when he was ten years old, that he remembers from his life in October, 1850.

A day in which his father takes him out on a hunt,

and he kills his first partridge.

~~~~

I decided I must have this book, so off I sent for

it, paying dearly, but justly so, or so I figured.

I was just longing to hear of the lives

lived by my family...

years gone by...

but lived just the same.

I wanted a connection somehow, with

those gone before... to somehow glimpse

into their lives...

to live a bit alongside

them.

~~~~

In the book...

He speaks of his life on the farm in

West Monroe, NY...

of his beloved home and the sweet

land surrounding...

of his father and mother,

my great, great, great grandparents.

It was all such a dream come true almost,

to be reading of the lives of my

family... but something still

was missing...

until...

I read this...

'He [Newton's father] then picked up his gun, and was about to start on,

but he stopped, lowered the gun, and stood and gazed

long and silently upon the waters of the spring. He

looked like a piece of statuary, as he stood there-the

woods all about, and the beautiful spring just in front of

him. I asked him what he was thinking about. He

started, and looked at me, and said, " It is thirty years

since the first time I saw that spring. I was twenty-one

years of age, and these waters bubbled up and ran away,

just as they do now. All these years has this spring

been noiselessly sending forth to the world that same life-

giving water. It never gets weary, nor does it stop for a

moment in its good work. The Divine Being, to whom

we are all accountable, and who guides us all our lives,

if we will let Him, furnishes the fountain somewhere in

the hills. This spring, my boy, should teach us a lesson

in life. It should teach us that the things that come

from God's hands are pure and clean. It should teach

us not to stop in our efforts to do our fellow-men good.

It should teach us to do acts of love without show or

noise. It does tell us that God has provided, and will

provide for all the beings dependent upon Him."'

They knew Him...

they were His children...

what joy this was to me!

To read that my great... grandfather

believed such of the Lord...

and to see that even today, almost

two hundred years later, his words

of truth still ring true.

To me...

I can see that all that comes from God's

hands is pure and clean...

and good.

Just as He walked with and guided

my ancestors,

He will be with

me.

~~~~

I love the quote at the top of the picture...

we are all preceded in this world by

a Love story...

if we choose to follow Jesus.

And His Love lasts forever...

from generation,

to generation.

He remains

Faithful.

I will bless the LORD who has

given me counsel;

My heart also instructs me

in the night seasons.

I have set the Lord always

before me;

Because He is at my right

hand I shall not be moved.

Therefore my heart is glad,

and my glory rejoices;

My flesh also will rest in

hope.

Psalm 16:7-9

From Everlasting, to Everlasting...

My grandfather and my mother.

But the mercy of the Lord is

from everlasting to

everlasting

On those who fear Him,

And His righteousness to

children's children,

To such as keep His

covenant,

And to those who remember

His commandments to do

them.

Psalm 103:17-18

Sisters...

Bethany and me

forever and for always.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I can remember the day my mom told me

that she was going to have a baby. A baby!

I was finally going to have a sister...

or so I believed.

My mother tells me that before that day

and for 8 months after that day, I

prayed for my sister.

I just knew it was a girl...

because... doesn't the Lord

give us exactly what we ask for in

faith?

( I now have come to realize that we do not

always receive everything we ask for... but the faith of a child

still amazes me.)

I had a name all picked out for her,

but fortunately, she isn't named

it!

I loved her the minute I saw her...

she was mine...

my little sister.

I dreamed of the day when she could play

dolls with me, when we could

play dress-up in my gorgeous dresses and heels,

when we could share clothes.

I would take my clothes and

roll the sleeves and legs 10 times

just so we could wear somewhat matching clothes.

When I got a bunk-bed, we were so excited!

When she became a tad bit older she would

have the double size lower

part, and I would sleep on the top.

That never worked out...

we eventually got rid of that bed because

the top was rarely used.

For years we shared our double bed,

pretending we were sailing away

in a huge ship, or clacketty-clacking away

on a train to who knew where.

We played dolls,

we played house,

we shared secrets,

and chicken-pox,

we played make-up,

we did ballet and

acrobatics,

we did almost any imaginable thing...

together.

When she was little...

she needed me.

I taught her things, and helped her.

She wasn't very brave at all, but I

was.

She was shy, so

I talked for her.

She needed me.

It was a great feeling!

Now...

I have come to see that I needed her.

She was there every time to listen,

even when she probably didn't really

understand.

She listened to countless stories of joy and

heartache,

always with a loving heart and encouraging trust.

A while back I realized that my sister does not really

need me anymore.

It was quite the shock...

it took me by surprise.

Where have the years

gone?

Now...

we are best friends.

The years have melted away in difference and

we seem closer in age.

She's not the shy one anymore...

now I am...

she sometimes speaks for me...

but usually we just end up saying the same

thing at the same time as the other.

Our friendship is so sweet and true...

it runs deep.

It's in our blood.

As a father pities his children,

So the Lord pities those who

fear Him.

Psalm 103:13

After writing about my memories of'

berry picking with my Mama~lou,

loads of other precious

memories came rolling in

as faithful as the waves

of the sea... memories...

like old friends...

faithful and true.

Always there, even when

we're not looking... yet that's

when they seem to appear...

whispering, 'don't forget...'

One memory that's not too far into

my past, is the time that my mom,

sister and I took a 'spur-of-the-moment'

road trip to Ludington, Michigan.

It was a quick decision, because of

my brother, who

incidentally had been trek-ing, cross-country

on his bicycle and had broken the rim of the wheel.

We brought him a replacement...

how kind... how thoughtful...

how exciting.

So, we loaded up our van, tent and all,

and headed out to a land where no man has ever

traveled... well, perhaps not that far west,

but farther than we'd ever been.

It was quite the girl time...

full of fun and laughter, and

endless Adventures in Odyssey.

We traveled through Canada for most of the trip,

and the sweet, southern boy, border official

who welcomed us back

into the states when we

finally reached

Michigan,

was such a sight for sore eyes...

believe me.

We camped right next to a graveyard...

I loved it.

We swam in the Lake...

I loved it.

We walked 5 miles round trip to a lighthouse...

yes, I even loved that.

We ate scrumptious ice-cream...

I loved it!

We walked around the quaint village and visited the area shops...

and ate at a sweet little Italian pizza restaurant, which

needless to say had delicious pizza and authentic accents...

I LOVED IT!!!

We traveled back home a slightly different route

so that my brother could follow us and

camp with us along the way for a couple of days.

Two nights, one at a

hotel... with quite the rodeo show,

and one night at a campground...

that looked more like a trailer park, and we were

camping in their village green.

Picture all of the the residents...

sitting on their front porches..

just staring at the 'newcomers', wondering (rightly so)

why in the world we were there.

I wondered too.

I have to say though, that I loved it...

the spectacular view of trailer homes...

the bathroom right across the way...

the little swamp right next to our tent...

In the morning we set off,

parting ways with our brother and son...

sure we would see him again in a few weeks...

unless that blessed tire gave out again...

then it would be sooner.

This is such a wonderful memory that I carry...

one that I will never forget.

Proving that perfect surroundings

and planned events aren't always

the best.

Sometimes it's the simple and

heartfelt ventures that matter most.

As far as the east is from the

west,

So far has He removed

our transgressions from

us.

Psalm 103:12

For as long as I can remember, or at least

since I could start reading 'Westerns',

I have wanted to go 'West'.

Being almost as far East as one

can go, though, thank heavens not

that far... I've thought of going

'out there' often.

This picture is of our vacation to

Lake Michigan. It is as far

west as I've been.

But I loved

every moment of it.

I could look and look at the

water as it stretched westward

across to Wisconsin, but my

eyes could never take in all

of it.

I once had the thought that every where in the world,

there is always a west.

No matter where you may travel,

there is always somewhere farther west.

It just keeps on going...

that's how far...

How great

is His

love.

For as the heavens are high

above the earth,

So great is His mercy toward

those who fear Him;

Psalm 103:11

When I was a little girl,

I used to look up into the sky at night

and feel so small.

It seemed so very far away...

so high...

so distant...

I could never measure its height,

nor its depth.

It was immense,

and even at such a young age,

I knew this with

feeling.

So...

when I read this verse,

it is amazing to me.

So great is His

mercy...

The Lord is merciful and

gracious,

Slow to anger,

and abounding in mercy.

Psalm 103:8

This is a good thing!

The Lord executes

righteousness

And justice for all who are

oppressed.

Psalm 103:6

This verse calms my fears,

for He is mighty to save.

He sees everything under the

heavens,

and knows the hearts of all

mankind.

He sees the

silent cry of the humble,

and the desire of the

weak.

He cares!

And He will not be

unfaithful...

He sees the orphan,

the widow's tears,

and the soul that is

bound in darkness.

He is the great

deliverer,

He can be

trusted.

Who satisfies your mouth

with good things,

So that your youth is

renewed like the eagle's.

Psalm 103:5

When I put this picture with this

verse, it reminded me of a

special memory...

Holley

asked us today what meaningful

memories we have in our life's

story. I immediately had

a few come to mind...

which one to choose...

they all have been meaningful

in some way. Lessons learned,

heart touched,

dreams made.

I remember...

the hot sun on my back,

the tingling of tanning shoulder and

nose skin,

the song of the whippoorwill in the

tall grasses,

the scratch, scratch, scratch of the bushes

on my legs,

the feel of the warm dirt between my toes,

the buzz of the bugs around my face,

Grandpa asking if I wanted a bucket around

my waist,

the smell and taste of sun-warmed,

tart berries,

the sting of a sweat-bee behind my legs,

the call of the cool, pool water just across

the way,

and my mama's face.

I remember her form...

bent over the bushes,

her fingers picking swiftly

and diligently,

the way her hair would gently wisp

across her forehead,

her scratched arms and berry, stained hands,

her baskets filling faster than mine,

her warm freckly smile,

her eyes that glinted with glee when we tried that first

berry each summer,

her patience with my help,

and the lessons

she shared...

lived.

"These very same berries that we pick

will be enjoyed far longer than just today,

or this summer", she would say...

"don't give up, you will be happy

you persevered

when the time comes."

And I always was.

This memory has grown and matured

over the years, but those first ones

are the very best!

Thank you Mama~Lou

Who redeems your life from

destruction,

Who crowns you with

lovingkindness and tender

mercies,

Psalm 103:4

He redeems our life from destruction... this is

a wonderful thing. If He had not chosen to

do this for us, we would

have no chance at all.

This is a gift for all.

But acceptance

and repentance,

on our part

is necessary.

What love

He has shown us!

O, the deep, deep Love...

He crowns us...

I have known this crowning,

though deserving, I am not.

It is such a precious gift to be crowned

with His lovingkindness

and tender mercies.

How precious!

His good gifts are

endless, and He pours them

out.

O, the deep, deep Love of Jesus...

May I thank Him always

and

remember.

Who forgives all your

iniquities,

Who heals all your diseases,

Psalm 103:3

All is a big word.

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

and forget not all His benefits:

Psalm 103:2

The Lord's benefits are endless. If I could

remember every single one, I would not have

enough paper to write upon, or ink for pen.

I try to remember them all, and say that

I am, but really,

is that true?

God's word tells us to remember His

benefits.

Not just know about them, and

acknowledge that they exist,

but to really remember them.

This is a good exercise to partake in.

It shows us that He really is good,

that EVERYTHING that is good

in our lives is from Him.

Even if I am still waiting for

things, I am not

lacking in anything.

If I wasn't graced

with His benefits, then

I would surely

be in need.

Just being called His child,

is a benefit...

having His Word...

knowing His peace...

feeling His love...

receiving His grace...

waking in the morning to a new day...

being able to dance...

singing His praises...

holding a baby...

smelling a flower...

loving someone...

swimming in the ocean...

laughing with a friend...

picnics in a meadow...

watching a sunset...

calling Him Father...

knowing that He's making a place for me...

and learning from His gentle lessons.

These are just a few...

I will remember...